Understanding the “why” behind your birth preferences.

There are so many people and companies that share content these days about the “right” way to birth. With so many of these messages coming at us all of the time, it can be easy to lose sight of what our own birth preferences are in the midst of all of the noise. Then, if we don’t realize that we’ve taken on someone else’s expectations or opinions as our own, this can lead to a disappointing or frustrating birth experience. This is because we don’t truly understand the “why” behind the decisions that we’re making. And then, when our birth doesn’t live up to our (or someone else’s expectations), this can cause comparison and disappointment.

To truly go into a birth experience prepared, we need to understand what is driving our decisions. There are SO many reasons as to why each and every one of us make the decisions that we do. This is based on our life experiences, values, and hopes for the future. Due to everyone’s diverse life circumstances and values, there are too many “whys” to list that could possibly be driving each person’s birth experience. Without knowing our “whys,” we can easily fall into comparison, and this can steal the joy out of our unique birth journeys.

With my first birth experience, I unknowingly went into it with comparison and competitiveness at the forefront of my decision making. This led to an experience that quickly went a route I didn’t want because my first decisions in the process did not line up with the my core “why” that I wasn’t even aware of because I didn’t take the time to define it. This is why having a birth doula and photographer can be so helpful along this journey. We can objectively ask questions and create space to give you the time to define your “why” and then evaluate each decision against this.